Scotland. It’s a country with a long, proud, and storied heritage of resistance, national pride, haggis, kilts, New Year’s Eve songs, and Mel Gibson....
Recently, I found myself transferring through the Mediterranean island of Cyprus, where, alongside an impromptu spit roast between the two Greek cocks of some local guys, I found some unlikely sex gift souvenirs to add to my Goon Cave.
I started the morning with a gun in my face and interrogation from the world's last-surviving KGB secret police force. I was cleaning a nymphomaniac Russian whore's squirt out of my beard after some vodka-fuelled sex by the end of the day.
