If we jumped out of your closet and bellowed the word “VIETNAM!” into your sleeping face, chances are the first things you’d think of are war and hookers.
If you’re on this website and reading this article, then chances are you’ve figured out we’d be far more interested in the ‘hookers’ part of Vietnam than the war.
You’d be 100% correct in this assumption; it’s even possible that we have first-hand experience with the seedier side of Vietnam.
Allow us, dear reader, to impart our hard-earned knowledge on the finer workings of the Vietnam sex trade and reveal everything you need to know.
Vietnamese Women. What Are They Like?
It’s a sad fact that, despite being an absolutely awesome country to visit, Vietnam simply does not get the sort of exposure that its flashier neighbour, Thailand, gets on the tourism front.
Most of our preconceptions come from half-remembered flashes of Full Metal Jacket and Platoon, and so it’s not uncommon that Vietnamese people (and, by extension, their ladies) simply get lumped in with other East Asian people. This couldn’t be more inaccurate.
In our experience, the stereotype of Japanese women (short, demure, submissive, eager to please) tends to get transferred to all Asian women, including the Vietnamese.
This is much like comparing Danish people to Spanish because they’re both European – flawed on a fundamental level.
Vietnamese women are short, this is true. They’re also quite dark-skinned, have broad features, and typically have very voluptuous figures in comparison to Eastern Asian women (Chinese, Korean, Japanese).
Sexually speaking, they’re also much more adventurous than the aforementioned ladies, for whom there is a cultural bias towards appearing “innocent” and sexually naïve.
Not so for Vietnamese women, who know their way around a dick and are not afraid to show it.
Overall, Vietnamese girls are up there with Filipinas for sexual forthrightness, and we’d be willing to wager you’ll have a much better experience for it.
What Sort of Hookers Can I Find in Vietnam?
As is the case in so very many countries, prostitution in Vietnam is technically illegal and so is not always out in the open.
There are exceptions (such as Bui Vien Street in Ho Chi Minh City/Saigon) to this, but don’t expect to be openly bombarded with solicitations as you might be in Thailand or the Philippines.
That caveat out of the way: you can expect to find similar sorts of hookers in Vietnam as you would in any East Asian nation. There are bar girls, karaoke girls, streetwalkers, massage girls – you name it, they’ve probably got it.
A word of warning – Vietnam is a country where it’s pretty easy to get scammed, especially if you’re a green-around-the-gills foreigner unfamiliar with the lingo, the money and your surroundings. Exercise extreme care whilst in the country.
Without further ado, let’s explore the various flavors of hooker you will find in Vietnam.
Note: all prices are given in USD. At the time of writing, 1 USD = 23,000 Vietnamese Dong approx.)
Not as common as in more open countries such as Thailand/the Philippines, streetwalkers can nevertheless still be found in Vietnam.
Don’t expect to find too many in Hanoi (which is, generally, a pretty uptight city), but in a city of sin like Saigon/HCM City, it’s pretty damn easy.
Vietnamese streetwalkers can usually be identified by their short skirts and cock-hungry smiles.
Depending on where you are they may approach you, but if you’re in a more conservative city you might need to do a bit of legwork.
Don’t expect the most amazingly attractive girls if you’re going for a streetwalker; on the other hand, however, their prices are pretty reasonable for a “short stay” at your hotel.
Price: up to $20
Cocksuckin’ Blowjob Parlours!
Ubiquitous in Saigon (which really is the sex capital of the country – the actual capital, Hanoi, doesn’t even come close), blowjob parlours pretty much offer what you’d expect.
They don’t even pretend to do massages in these places, they just whip your dick out and go (very expertly) to town. The girls run the gamut from average to incredible – just don’t expect sex in these places because that, they do not do.
Price: $15 approx.
Sing And Sex With Karaoke Girls
Similarly to other Asian countries that boast “special” karaoke experiences, Vietnam has private karaoke girls where you essentially pay for both the room and to be accompanied by a girl.
Dissimilarly to what you might get in other countries, these karaoke experiences are almost uniformly not worth it in Vietnam.
They’re expensive before you even get to the possibility of extracurricular hanky-panky, and you might quite often walk away with nothing more than a case of blue balls.
Should you be able to negotiate taking one of the girls off-site with you to your hotel room, it ain’t gonna be cheap.
The room itself can be anywhere from $10-$20 an hour (depending on how much they think they can milk you for), the mandatory watered-down drinks for the girls run around $5 a pop, and paying the girl’s ‘bar fine’ should she agree to go with you can cost about $10-$15.
Remember this is all before you even get to negotiate with the girl for her services, which could be $20-$40.
All in all: avoid karaoke girls. You can get the goods elsewhere for much cheaper.
Price: up to $80
Barfines And Bar Girls
There are two flavors of bar girls in Vietnam, and only one of them is a potential prospect for going home with you. The trick is figuring out which one you’re talking to.
The easiest way to figure this out is to look at the kind of bar you’re in. If it’s a US-style sports bar which is big and open, pool tables, sports on the TV etc. etc. hen you may end up with a girl accompanying you (and therefore you’ll be paying for her drinks).
But she is not going to be going anywhere with you. She’s just company. Since you’re reading this article that’s not what you’re interested in, so avoid this sort of bar.
The bar that you do wanna end up in is a tad seedier, usually located back from the street a little bit, and little in the way of big open windows. The girls that come sit with you in these will, for a fee, accompany you back to your hotel.
Price: Expect to pay a bar fine of around $15; for actual sex, you’ll need to negotiate with the girl, but it should be around $18-22.
Freelance Vietnamese escorts are pretty easy to find, particularly in Saigon. If you’re in a club and a girl initiates contact, chances are she’s a freelance escort.
You may be expected to first buy her a drink so she can make sure you’re not a serial killer, and during this drink, you can negotiate her fee.
Note that, although there is no bar fine to pay for a freelancer, she may charge a little more depending on how hot she is. Obviously the hotter she is, the more you can expect to pay.
Price: $20 for a short stay (once and done), $40-50 for a long stay (overnight)
Happy Ending Massage Girls
Naughty massage parlors can be found throughout Vietnam and are much more popular than traditional brothels in conservative places like Hanoi.
The massage will feature an, uh, massage, and you’ll be offered a happy ending for an extra fee.
Could well be your thing, but since you’ll end up spending about the same (or even more) than you would in a blowjob parlor, why not just go to one of those?
Similarly to the blowjob parlors, sex is not on the menu here. It doesn’t matter how much you offer, it will not fly.
Price: $13 (massage) plus $18-20 (handjob)
Ladyboys With a Little Extra
Unfortunately, unlike neighbouring Thailand, there isn’t really a huge trans community in Vietnam, and you’re unlikely to come across any even in as debauched a place as Bui Vien Street.
You may get lucky on dating apps, but in general, if you’re after ladyboys, hit up next door in Thailand or hop a plane to the Philippines.
Tips And Tricks On The Vietnam Sex Scene
Vietnam undoubtedly makes for an absolutely fantastic holiday, particularly for the discerning gentleman looking for some female company.
However, it can also be a hotbed for scamming and petty crime. That said, bear in mind our tips when soliciting the services of a Vietnamese hooker…
Know Your Dong!
The Vietnamese Dong is a pretty confusing currency from a western perspective. First of all the numbers are so inflated, that it’s tough to keep track of how much things are and how much you’re spending.
The locals can – and will – absolutely take advantage of this if you’re not careful.
A common scam is to accept payment from you in the form of a larger bill (for instance, a 50,000 bill), switch it out for a smaller one (a 5,000 one), and then claim you made a mistake.
“Nothing is ever so expensive as what is offered for free.”–Viet Thanh Nguyen
If you’re overly polite or simply too drunk to say otherwise, you may end up taking your deceiver at their word and handing over extra money.
That said: know your Dong. Learn the bills by their colour rather than their number, and you should be fine. And don’t let the locals fast-talk you out of money until you’re sure what’s happening.
Watch Your Belongings
It’s a sad fact that petty theft is rife in SE Asian countries, and Vietnam is no different. Always beware of pickpockets, even when in a massage place/blowjob parlour.
Don’t allow your belongings to leave your sight and keep them nearby. And if you have someone come over to your hotel room, do not leave them alone in the room.
Foreigners are a juicy target, and although you’re unlikely to be the target of violent robbery, people will take advantage if they can.
Avoid Confrontation With Locals
Vietnamese people are generally pretty warm and welcoming, but they stick together and take care of their own.
If you start yelling at a hooker on the street or kick one out after some payment disagreement, you’ll either draw a hostile crowd, or she’ll call her cousin and his buddies and draw one for you.
Remember that you’re a guest in this country, and that the locals once kicked the ass of the world’s most powerful country. You’re not winning any fight.
Negotiate The Price Upfront And Don’t Get Conned
Full disclosure: we’ve been on the receiving end of the sunk-cost fallacy in Vietnam, where a clearly shitty massage-parlour experience keeps going south and you keep giving more money for ‘extras’ that never materialize.
Particularly an issue when you’re drunk and horny, more than one Vietnamese prostitute will realize when she’s in a position to milk some poor sap for plenty of money whilst giving nothing in return.
Avoid this by agreeing on the price and services rendered before money changes hands.
Saigon Is The Place To Be
We can’t put it any plainer than this: for sex tourism, Saigon is a million times better than anywhere else in Vietnam.
Even touristy places like Da Nang can’t compete with the choices on offer in Saigon, and if you’re after hot Vietnamese ladies for reasonable prices, you simply cannot beat Saigon.
(Note: Saigon’s official name is “Ho Chi Minh City”, but it’s used interchangeably with “Saigon”).
Commonly Asked Questions About Vietnam
Vietnam might have been the centre of one of the most significant conflicts of the 20th Century, but this country is still relatively mysterious. So let’s answer some FAQs!
Where is Vietnam Located?
Vietnam is located on the Indochina peninsula in South East Asia. Its neighbours countries like China, Laos, and Cambodia. In the East and South of Vietnam, the country is home to a South China Sea coastline.
Is Vietnam Communist?
Between 1953 and 1986, Vietnam was under a hardcore communist dictatorship for over three decades. Whilst things are more liberal, Vietnam is still a socialist republic with a one-party political system led by a Communist Party. So yes, Vietnam is still Communist.
Is Vietnam Safe?
Overall, Vietnam is a safe country to visit provided you implement basic common sense and do your research on common scams in Vietnam ahead of time.
What’s The Best Way to Travel Around Vietnam?
From plans and trains to planes and boats, there is a tonne of options to get around Vietnam with some more comfortable than others and some more adventurous than others. Overall, travelling around Vietnam is very cheap.
“I can’t say what made me fall in love with Vietnam – that a woman’s voice can drug you; that everything is so intense. The colours, the taste, even the rain.” -Graham Greene
And that’s that. Overall, Vietnam is a fascinating, vibrant, and rewarding sex tourism destination.
Just remember to keep your wits about you, follow our advice, and enjoy your Vietnam sex trip to the max!
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Did we miss anything off the ultimate Vietnam sex guide? Have you perchance stumbled across an untapped harem of Vietnamese ladyboys that we’re unaware of? Drop us a line and educate us!